Online Dating

Many people (women older than 22 and men now older than 25) here in Happy Valley have already resorted to online dating. Where I am from (which is out of state), the people who begin to seek a mate in cyberspace are at least 30 years old, possibly divorced, may have never been on a date, live in their parents' basement, elderly looking for a dying companion or are complete social  rejects. 

So why then, do I know so many people under the age of 30, seemingly normal, looking for love on the internet? I've heard so many horror stories that don't just involve people showing up 50lbs heavier than their profile says. Here's a story from one individual I know: 

24 year-old female, tall, blonde, has a master's degree, seeking an equally tall, emotionally available man, 24 years or older. They meet up at a restaurant for ice cream (because Mormons don't drink coffee) around lunch time for the first encounter. Safe, yes...it's not a whole meal, so if it doesn't look like it's working you, you didn't waste more than an hour of your time. If it does work out, then next time dinner, right? The "date" goes well. He makes a joke, she laughs, they decide to get together again. They depart. The girl goes home, and deciding that the food at that restaurant looks pretty good, she invites her roommate to join her their for lunch. Where, as I'm sure you've guessed it, they find the male from the earlier date, enjoying more ice cream with a totally different girl. The roommates stay inconspicuous, and in thirty minutes, the young man is enjoying lunch with a 3rd female. As it turns out, he didn't want to spend more than one day wasting time with women that wouldn't be the perfect mate. Understandable, right? What self-respecting person wants to waste their time with someone that isn't any good for them? So is his home-made version of speed dating really that wrong? Or is it just desperate? 

Why do we, here in Utah Valley, have such a strong need to be married so young? Aren't we living for any other purposes? Yes, yes, we are taught since Sunbeams that the family is our core and that we should grow up and create our own; but why aren't any of us living for more than just that? Shouldn't we be bringing qualities like self-worth and independence to our marriages and relationships? We are taught that we are "children of God", so why aren't we taking that to heart? 

The definition of "knowing who you are" can be interpreted in so many different ways. I wonder, are many of us getting divorced these days because our own definition is "knowing who I am with him" or "with her" instead of "knowing who I am" all on my own? Without my roommates, without my parents, without my boyfriend?